Sappy 

At the end of the day everyone returns to their lives and we’re left with only memories …

Memories of the people who mattered.. But, it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all… It’s better to have risked it all for nothing than to never have risked at all… 

And now all these things are getting down to  me… Rushing in and inundating me… 
Allow me to remember every moment you made me cry and I’d still love you over and over again… Empty promises broken.. 

Papa, I never got the chance to cry by your graveside because I couldn’t bring myself to believing that you were gone… And when I walked into your room only to find that,that support machine was pulled out -i was locked up in denial… I’m sorry I held every bit of you so close ..

I’m sorry I never had the guts to say that I loved you.. I’m sorry I was selfish for all the times we were friends.. Allow me to feel every bit Of this And best friend, I’m sorry that I made fun of  your hair every time it fell off till the day I walked into your room and found you there lying cold and motionless and your head bald… 


Allow me to laugh at all the silly things we did together…allow me to call to mind every being of you in my life… 
And love, I’m sorry that I never said thank you when you got me that purple dress because all I did was complain about how ugly it was.. 


Allow me to remember every moment your lips curled up in a smile everytime Saw me… 
Allow me to cry because I just learnt that I’ll be an aunty -and I’m sure you’re wondering what that has to do with crying -but yes, because on the same day Maya was born, her mum passed on and the only mother she’s ever known is our Aunt Zaky ..
I feel so much… Pain, laughter, smiles… Mixed emotions and thoughts.. But allow me to feel it all
Allow me to remember every moment I’d stay up waiting for you to come home and you’d be late again And we’d fight and yell at each other till the neighbors were up… 
Allow me to laugh at every memory of us walking and singing into the night and we’d  wake the entire neighborhood like Tom and Jerry.. 


Allow me to feel sappy… Allow me to wipe my tears this time round and when I fall – please help me stand.. When I act up, please hang in there because that’s what best friends are for… 

When I get pissed for no good reason, remind me  of how ugly my face looks… 

And when I fall in love with this whole idea of you being there every time I need someone to talk to, everytime I need someone to walk home with, or make silly jokes, and hold my hand everytime I feel like I’m loosing it -please make sure my back is  covered …

Just allow me to feel it all… 

And when I’m breaking down remind me that the sun will shine again tomorrow  and there’s no reason to lose hope…

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